Craft Beers, Craft Beards & DMB.

My bad, you guys. I inadvertently took a 2 week hiatus for absolutely no reason. I don’t even have a cool vacation story, or ground breaking life event to share as means of an excuse, other than I got super busy and a little bit lazy! Ugh, step it up, Mallory. Thankfully I have today off from work, so I can catch up on here a little bit, and then resume with the normal posts this Wednesday and Friday. In the meantime, can you guys settle for a weekend recap? You can? Great. You’re so accommodating!

  • Friday

Friday night Jake and I met up with a few friends for my town’s annual Main Street Days festival. It’s equal parts craft beer garden, local vendors selling overpriced boutique items, and carnival. The last time I went to Main Street Days was my senior year of high school, and strangely enough my first date with Jake (we have not been together the entirety of those six years, btw. Sorry to bring a screeching halt to whatever Nicholas Sparks-esque fantasy you were dreaming up about us). I tried out three beers, successfully avoided the fried Oreos, and had fun on a few rides. Here’s an extremely romantic shot of Jake and I on the ferris wheel.

Great.

Great.

We also went on what’s known as the “Zipper” which is essentially a hellish death trap that suspends you upside down for a handful of seconds, and then violently propels you back and forth until you deeply regret the three beers you drank earlier. While my stomach was still in my throat, we took it upon ourselves to go on the “Spaceship 3000”, which was bumping a lot of Top 40 hits from 2002-2005. I of course loved that aspect. When you first walk into the ride, you are told to lean back against a plank, while the ride spins around like a demonic carousel. Fun fact: When I first rode the Spaceship 3000 in 2008, a kid from high school was climbing around (which you AREN’T supposed to do!), fell, and his elbow hit me square in the face, and I blacked out for the remainder of the ride. As you can imagine, it really added something special to my date that night. Once that ride was over, I was pretty much over anything that was fast, and nauseating, so we went on a mini haunted house ride, and did some bumper cars. Jake and his friends did an obstacle course designed for children. Jake fell and cut his hand, thus reaffirming why he shouldn’t be out in the public. By the time they were done I was feeling pretty awful, considering that I am a moron and took it upon myself to wear brand new sandals and walk probably a distance of 2-3 miles that night. By the end of the night I had cuts on both feet, and a blister that felt like a balloon. Gross? Sorry. Needless to say I was little grumpy by the end of the night, and ready to google the costs of purchasing a Hoveround.

  • Saturday

Saturday morning my Dad and I ran the Tasty Run 5k in Addison. We ran it last year and had a lot of fun. You have free access to the Taste of Addison food festival afterwards, and there’s always free stuff to pick up as well! They had little food stops a long the run, but I was champ and only stopped for Cane’s lemonade! I came in 7th of out 20 in my age group, and my dad came in first for his (100+ years…jk). Once we were home I made a bee line for my bed and proceeded to crash and take a three hour nap. Once I awoke from my brief coma, I went and got my nails done. Note to self, don’t get your nails done on the same afternoon a hoard of teens are getting ready for their prom. That place was packed! My nail tech asked me if I too was getting ready for prom, and promptly submitted her application for sainthood and then let her know that I was actually 23. She was also kind enough not to comment on my toenails that are still bruised from my half marathon that I ran more than a month ago. I had to text my sister and make sure I wasn’t anemic or dying, and that it’s normal for toenails to stay bruised for long periods of time. Phew. Once I was home, I got dressed and Jake and I headed to Dallas to see Dave Matthews Band at Gexa Energy Pavillion (it will always be Smirnoff Center to me).

"PLAY SONGS FROM BECAUSE OF WINN DIXIE!!!"

“PLAY SONGS FROM BECAUSE OF WINN DIXIE!!!”

 

It was my first DMB show, and I believe Jake’s 108th, so that was fun. I’ll be honest, I probably know like a solid five DMB songs, and naturally, the one show I go to, they play 2 out of the 5, so I’m left awkwardly swaying, swatting away weed smoke so I don’t provoke an asthma attack on my mother on my return home. I really did have fun though. It was a great live show, and some prime people watching. Most men were dressed like they were on their frat’s spring retreat, and most of the girls donned flower crowns and crop tops as if they stepped straight out some tumblr-Coachella-lookbook hybrid. The double date in front of us was especially great. Two of the guys brought their own…well, “greenery” if you will, and another brought an entire bottle of Jack Daniel’s. An hour later 3/4 of the group were fast asleep. One girl attempted to wake her boyfriend so they could leave, and watching him stand and saunter around was a lot like watching a toddler on an anti-gravity treadmill. All of this set to the sweet jamz of DMB, made for a wonderful evening.

  • Sunday 

I literally did nothing.

That was my weekend, y’all. I saw Godzilla today, but I’ll save that review for this week’s Friday Finds, which is my way of saying that blog post consistency will resume once again! (I will say that you should definitely blow off work sometime this week and see it. That is all).

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