Why hello there, friends. Looks like we have once again stumbled upon the second hardest day of the week (behind Monday, obviously), Wednesday. Much like Tommy and Gina, we are halfway there, though hopefully blue collar monotony is not killing you as much as those two. I came home to find my idiot cat in the front yard (he is only allowed to be in the backyard under supervision), so that was a pleasant Wednesday surprise. Needless to say, Gilbert will not be going out for awhile. Well enough of my sad cat lady Wednesday, let’s go somewhere, shall we?
- The Today Show
If there’s anything I love about sick days, or anything involving me not having to be anywhere between the hours of 7 am to 4 pm, it’s daytime television. While I’m not a soap opera person, I am quite big on everything from The Today Show to Jerry Springer reruns. My family actually used to gather around and watch Jerry Springer together. It was so much of a secret shame I was even told not to tell my friends about it at school, but I told everybody. Strangely enough, at age eight I lacked a lot of peers who were as fascinated as I was by paternity tests and trailer park love triangles. When I got to college, I gravitated towards morning variety/news shows, namely the Today Show, and then one semester I was lucky enough to have a mid morning slot open in between classes and I was introduced to finest hour of television, The Today Show with Kathy Lee Gifford and Hoda Kotb.
If you are not familiar with these women, then A) You probably were not around for the 90’s when KLG used to rule with Regis or B) You are doing more important things at 10 o’clock in the morning, like your job. Kathy and Hoda are two fantastically upbeat women (but not so much that you want to gouge your eyes out) who, like any right minded person in the world, enjoy a glass of wine in the morning. Granted, I think it’s like 11 am when they are taping it, but it’s morning drinking at it’s finest. They spend the hour filling you in on current events, pop culture, and interesting tidbits regarding chunky bracelets, juicing, or whatever moms are into at the moment. On a good day, a lot of passive aggressive banter goes on between the two, and the stifled laughs, and side eyes are FANTASTIC. I’m making it out to seem like they hate each other, but I’d like to think that they are really best friends and looking for a third to round out their BFF circle and if anyone volunteers as tribute, it is me. Unfortunately when I was in New York last summer, I was a moron and scheduled my trip on a weekend, therefor I was not able to stand outside the window during a taping, or hope to god I was rounded up to play trivia for a chance to win one of Kathy Lee’s CDs (this actually something that happens. If you win a round of trivia, you get one of her albums. Not making this up).
- People’s Court
If you love 25 year old white trash dead beat dudes with tribal tattoos, women who owe their best friend’s $3000, or punk ass teens who egg their neighbor’s car, you will love The People’s Court. In Wikipedia terms:
American arbitration-based reality court show currently presided over by retired Florida State Circuit Court Judge Marilyn Milian. Milian, the show’s longest-reigning arbiter, handles small claims disputes in a simulated courtroom set
Much like America’s beloved, Judge Judy, Judge Milan isn’t having it, and she is not going to let you get away with your ridiculous tomfoolery. Judge Milan is taking on Florida, one screwball moron at a time, and if you are in the audience you are in for a show. I feel like I could try to illustrate the magic of this show all day, but let this clip speak for itself.
She let that frosted tipped, cheap suit toddler man have it, and for that she is the coolest and my favorite day time judge. If I ever find myself in Florida, you know I’m gonna wait in line all day in that Florida humidity and have my expand my hair to the point as if I touched a static electric ball just so I can be in that audience. Or who knows, maybe one day I’ll be living in Florida, and I’ll find myself in situation warranting a visit to The People’s Court. Actually, I’d prefer not to wind up in a situation where I have to sue an ex-boyfriend who holding my iguana ransom, or filing suit against a downstairs neighbor who refuses to turn down their 90’s jock jams. These are entirely fictional scenarios, but if you are familiar with TPC, then you know they aren’t that unlikely.
That’s all for this week’s IWTGTTW! Please share any day time talk show/court show you’d love to be in the audience for!